What You Should and Shouldn’t Do When You’re Dating Again

If you’re a senior and you’re back on the dating scene, you may be out of practice and unsure of what to do now that you’re dating again and this is totally normal. It’s hard to find someone who is completely comfortable with the dating scene, and you’re not alone if you’re feeling a little apprehensive. You don’t want to mess up and ruin any potential pairings that you have working for you, and if you’re nervous, you can act in a way that can scare off someone that you’re on a date with. So how can you know what’s good to do, and what you should avoid when you’re on your first few dates with someone new? Let’s take a look to find out.

Are you a divorcee? While this can be something that a new partner needs to know about, you don’t need to immediately disclose this information with every single person that you date. If the divorce was actually very recent, or there were any messy complications or emotionally charged aspects, then you need to try and put these aside during your date. While the temptation is certainly going to be there to talk about it and to get it off your chest, you need to resist the urge. You need to put yourself in the here and now, and push those emotions to the side for a brief period so you can get to know this person you’re with on a date. While it will be important to eventually disclose the information with the person if things pan out and you enter a standard relationship, it isn’t necessary to start off and tell everyone these details right off the bat.

Being older, you’re bound to both have children that are a big part of your life. Even if your children are grown and out on their own, your parental side never quite leaves, and you may be tempted to whip out those baby photos to show your date, but you need to resist the urge. If you both know that the other has children then you can broach the subject, but by no means should you spend an entire night talking only about your own children. The point of your own date is to get to know each other – not each other’s kids! After five minutes of basic conversation about your children, make an effort to move on to another subject of interest for both parties on the date.

The whole concept of “playing hard to get” is outdated, and is something that you’re too mature to do when you’re on a date. Life is short, so why waste time acting like you’re not interested, when you so clearly are? If you accepted their request for a date, or asked the other person on the date yourself, then you’ve also expressed at least basic minimal interest, so you don’t need to continue hiding it. While it’s never a good idea to throw yourself at someone and make overly clear advances on someone that you’ve just met, feel free to still flirt and express some kind of interest in the person you’re on a date with. Be sure not to spend your entire time comparing them to your past relationships, and be relatively open about your feelings.

If you’re a shy or anxious person, then you may get tongue-tied and worked up to the point where you can ruin a date with someone that may be perfect for you. You need to relax! Bolster your confidence as best as you can, and think about this date in a positive way that projects fun – not nerves. The entire point of a date is to enjoy yourself while getting to know someone new that you’re interested in, so why should that cause any nerves? It should cause happiness and excitement! You just need to be yourself, and let the chips fall as they may.

You need to be accepting, especially when you’re dating and your older, of those with other life commitments like children or careers. When you’re a senior, you’re more established and have a better sense of your responsibility, and you don’t want to hold that against someone that you’re dating. Everyone has their baggage and past life experiences, including you, so you need to be willing to be accepting when you’re entering a new partnership. But one thing that you never want to do is settle. Setting with someone who isn’t compatible with you, just to avoid being alone is silly, and will leave you feeling badly about yourself and your relationship situation.